Operation Toe Nail Fairy: Complete

So Big Brother has issues with anyone clipping his toenails or even touching his toes for that matter. He has been this way since he was little (he's only 4 though for cryin' outloud, but its gotten worse. He'll let you cut his fingernails, but NOT the toes. If I even get close to his toes, he says, "Mommmmyyyy, don't cut my toenails!" The only time we ever get to touch the toes is when we are putting on his socks--which he now sleeps in EVERY night and if you forget you will get reminded sometime --it may be 5 minutes after he goes to bed, or it could be at 3 in the morning when he awakens to find out that we forgot them and trot to our room announcing that we forgot and he needs them on. Yes, I don't know HOW, but he actually wakes up enough to realize there are no socks on his feet, gets out of bed, and walks to the other end of the house in pitch dark to our bedroom to inform us of our wrongdoing. How 'bout you put 'em on your own damn self then is what I'm saying???!!!!

So a month or two ago, it was time to cut the toenails. I was showing him how much it didn't hurt to get your toenails trimmed. We were visiting the grandparents. So I cut their toenails, my 13 year old cousin's toenails, my 3 year old cousin's toenails, my own toenails, his 4 month old baby sister's toenails, etc. I even bought him a $10 toy and set it in front of him and told him, "As soon as you let me clip your toenails, you can open this." He stared a HOLE into that toy box, but nope, no toenail trim.

My mom, in passing, just said, "We should do it while he's sleeping." DUH. Yes, she's a genuis. I told her that, too. And then asked what other tricks she had up her sleeve that she needed to share to help me out. She said she couldn't think of any more, but that if another occasion arose like this one, that she'd probably remember again and help me out.

So, that night we went in the bedroom while he was sleeping, clippers and flashlight in hand, and cut those suckers. He didn't even flinch. The next morning he awoke to a note from the Toe Nail Fairy attached to the $10 freaking toy saying, "See-it doesn't hurt when you get your toenails cut. I did it while you were sleeping!"

He was thrilled that he got to open the shark matchbox toy rescue thingy. I asked him if he saw the Toenail Fairy and he said, "Yes." I asked, "What does she look like?" He said, "She looks like a Mary. Kind of like the tooth fairy."

Kids, I tell ya.

It was time again to do it because his damn toenails were starting to curl around the toes, so I went in the other night. He wiggled around and then finally woke up and I just told him that I was making sure he had on socks that I thought I forgot them.

Tonight I drugged him, ahem, I mean I gave him some much-needed nighttime cold medicine, and then went in again. Got 'em girlfriends.

And there you have it. Mission accomplished. But this time I'm not leaving any freaking note...because all I need is for him to have yet another reason he needs a new toy. We'll just see if he notices!